Hi, everybody,

I wanted to ask anyone if they've experienced the phenomenon of delving into spiritual knowledge and totally experiencing self destruction as a result. I'm a person who feels like I know the result of any pursuit spiritual or otherwise based on who I am and my own motivation. This makes me shy away from pursuing anything for fear of experiencing something negative I intuitively know will happen. It seems like every path you can take on this plane is a rabbit hole. But pursuing a spiritual path is just as daunting. For instance, if you get too "high" you might be alone and unrelatable to others. If you get too "low", you might never make it out. Is there such thing as knowing more than you can handle? The road to totality seems so long and strenuous that I feel defeated before I even start. If anyone has experienced this, how did you deal with it?

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Hi Lauren

I know that feeling only to well,i have overloaded myself with seeking,and at times the information has got to much,i usally take a break from it all and enjoy some funny films,and other grounding activities,and when am ready i come back,we go to great lengths to avoid pain,and its a hard  path to handle at times,because really no matter whats going on out there,and the crazy insanity of the state of the world,it boils down to facing our inner fears and pain,and those ugly parts of ourselves,my experience is untill the inner work on our deep repressed emotions are felt and brought out why we have them,it manifests to the external,l usally just take time from worrying about it and enjoy the now,and when i feel strong enough ,i go back to it

sweet dreams.x

Thank you for replying, sword of truth. Do you ever feel that constant nudging, even when you are having fun? I found out a lot of spiritual things second hand and looking back I pursued it because I wanted to prove that I wasn't low frequency, but in the end, my inability to handle the info showed that anyway. Now, I feel that I've robbed myself of eternally significant experiences and processes trying to do too much too fast, or trying to compete with someone I thought was more "special" than me in the Creator's eyes. But what I've learned, second hand or naturally, I can't unlearn. So now I feel afraid to do anything here. Eat, see a movie, hang around others, but as you said, the biggest fear is what lay inside. I feel stuck- afraid to go in, afraid to go out.  I guess after that long response (sorry LOL), my question is, do you ever feel guilty doing external things when there is so much to clean up on the inside?

I've found we are as much physical as we are spiritual,to ignore one is to ignore an important part of us,and would make us unbalanced,i feel like i want to hurry up,and progress as quickly as possible,because i have a desire to find god,source,creator,but nothing will get done till we do the internal work first,we cant feel anying with blocked energy,it cant flow into us,maybe apart from the lower vibrations,so its important work also,as its part of your whole being to look after yourself physically,healthy food,good company,humor,ect ect,then that gives the strong foundations to do the spiritual work,i have had to learn this the hard way,lol,i thnk we can overload ourselves,and just need to ground at times,and remember not to feel guilty because its important work too.

sweet dreams x

I honor you for taking time to help me find insight. Thank you. I guess when your version of spirituality has been locked into a strict and almost impossible dogma to follow, the idea of heaven OR hell get's lodged in your mind and can be filtered into everything you see, including the idea of reincarnation and cleansing. It's all fear based, and bringing fear into everything can cloud one's vision. Thank you again, sword of truth for your assistance.

Your welcome,i wish you strength on your journey

sweet dreams x

Thank you ( : Same to you.

self destruction, self sabotage, lost & lonely , mis guided, mis educated  & still we all found it here... how cool is that. ;0)

True Morad. So true. Only people who feel like that would even attempt to search things out to end up here.

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