Hypochondria. Or perhaps a stroke.
But seriously, stop obsessing over physical senses... Trust your spirit. Take some hallucinogens or deprive yourself of sleep for 3 days and you will see how little your eyes really tell you. The 'veil' of physical sight is easily removed. Think about how your eyes work... They are seeing the reflection of light photon wave/particles that from an upside down image inside your eye that is then flipped and interpreted by your brain. The act of seeing is the act of interpreting.
Sure, after awakening to subtle energies you may begin to see them but so what? Try this - in a darkened room, close your eyes and meditate, focusing your attention on your palms positioned facing upwards with the thumb pressed gently to the side of the index finger. Once you start to feel the tingling pulsing vibrating feeling which is common i guess, then hold your palms in front of your closed eyes. If your anything like me, i start to see explosions of color, flashes and what not. Its kind of cool but in the end its not so profound and meaningful. If i fast and dont sleep for a few days which sometimes happens, I see mandalas on every surface in darkened rooms, sometimes i see faces of geometric colors looking back at me. I see so much more than i used to, and i believe its all there, its all behind the veil of reality. But again, so what? it just comforts me knowing that theres more to reality than the daily grind. Just because theres cool stuff going on with my perception doesnt mean i should spend my time staring at a wall.
Read the Seth material books by Jane Roberts.
Although they are channeled information (raises alarm bells for me usually), they are amazingly eloquent and the information resonates with me as to the nature of reality and beyond. Its approach to consciousness is in tune with quantum physics, string theory and theories like Dean Radin's Entanglement, and yet this material was 'channeled' and documented earlier. Once I got over my prejudices against the credibility of channeled information, I was surprised and amazed by the depth of the content. Even if the source of this material is simply the sub conscious of Jane and not another dimensional entity as claimed, it does not change the quality of the information, it is pretty profound philosophical content and a great way to look at reality so as to stop your analytical mind and embrace your intuitive mind.
Thats one that Im currently reading that deals with the creative mind vs the analytical mind. But perhaps the book to start with is "Seth Speaks" since this familiarizes the entity and certain concepts on multi-dimensional consciousness. This is the link for that one.
This may be not the full book, this torrent is the full book -
Theres many other books but I havent read them yet, so i can only mention these two.
Anyways you will benefit massively if you just switch off your internal monologue and stop analysing every perceptual anomaly, every shadow, every muscle twitch, every fart. Just be. We are "beings" for a reason and yet we rarely slow down and contemplate this.
not in detail.
I'm even more cautious about historic/ancient texts to be honest. I approach these and channeled information with an open mind but take things with a grain of salt. I find that its best to ignore details and focus on looking for patterns that reflect yourself or the human condition, and look for metaphoric meaning and perhaps the elemental cores that resonate. Basically remove the complexity and distill the essence, because if there is something of value, it will be simple.
Historic/ancient texts suffer from translation issues, as well as the game of 'chinese whispers' that gets played as knowledge is passed from generation to generation, epoch to epoch. If you check out etymology and metaphor in language evolution its interesting to see how words get twisted in meaning over time, sometimes to end up with an opposite meaning to their origin. Additionally, apart from this erosion of meaning, you have to consider who are the keepers of knowledge, who wrote the texts and who kept them? Often in history it is those in power who are the keepers of knowledge, and power corrupts. Words get manipulated to server their own end and maintain power over the people. All the guilt and fear mongering in Christianity is in my opinion a distortion of the original texts put in there by those in religious power to control the people. (this is just my opinion).
Furthermore, people who have supernatural/spiritual experiences have a human tendency to exaggerate their recollections or fill in the blanks because of difficulties in articulating the experience. My own memory of spiritual experiences becomes fuzzy because they defy rational thinking, they are communications with our subconscious mind that doesn't follow the order of written language and syntax. To properly translate a "spiritual encounter" into linear words is impossible, which means that these experiences are perhaps truly a personal thing. The desire to share these experiences is immense, but then, so is the temptation of the ego. I've had to learn the hard way to just keep things to myself.
So. It would be foolish to dismiss all ancient texts and channeled information, but it would be equally foolish to focus on these and analyze details. The best approach is to look for the elements, the metaphor, the patterns, and what personally resonates. Of all this kind of esoteric material that I've encountered, these Seth books are pretty solidly hitting the mark in articulating things i've sensed/felt for a while. How much of it is truth is not so important as how much of it speaks to me individually, and i suggest the same for you or any other.
Belief is an enigma, and should never be imposed upon another.
Are you talking about the squigglies? I've always wondered what they were then I found this today. I use to think that they were some form of energy ions or the orgone generated bions or just light beings that were really concentrated at higher vibrational sites. I would see the most at the springfed lake or where headwaters was here in San Marcos. Now I am unsure. I like what my imagination thinks, so I think I'll stick with light beings that hang out around cool places. :)